Hilarity ensued after a first year Agriculture student made an udderly brilliant blunder during a field trip to a farm.
The student, known only as MacDonald, was involved in an unfortunate mix-up which left him bringing a cow to ejaculation rather than to lactation.
“It didn’t taste too bad but I don’t think I’ll be having it on my Weetabix anytime soon,” laughed MacDonald, ever the joker. “That being said, I wouldn’t put it past the catering at Leazes.”
MacDonald is excited to finally tick this one off his bucket list and looks forward to being able to one-up the lads during Never Have I Ever.
His father was delighted to hear the news, saying: “He’d been thinking about studying in Cardiff, so me and the missus were worried he was a sheep-shagger. This is quite a relief in comparison, as you can imagine.”
The Toon Lampoon 