A woman has admitted that Boxing Day seems a little less unusual this year, thanks to the months of preparation with which 2020 provided her. Where usually a day dedicated to doing absolutely nothing would seem odd, it now seems more normal than ever.
The woman agreed to speak to our reporter, on account of her having genuinely fuck all else to do.
“If anything, the days where I have to do something are the ones that seem odd,” she explained. “What, I have to sit around and do nothing all day? Oh my, what a task.”
“Give me a break. If I wanted a real challenge I’d tell Uncle Terry that Black lives matter, or come over to Christmas Dinner wearing a pronoun badge.”
The Lampoon is glad to see her back in good spirits. She narrowly avoided a heart attack yesterday, when she realised she might have to do some cooking or something.
The Toon Lampoon 