A TV show has been dubbed “an acting masterclass” by the most irritating person you know, The Lampoon can reveal.
The incident occurred at a pub in Gateshead on Saturday. Our linguist team has confirmed literally any other phrasing would have been less insufferable.
“‘The cast are good’, literally just say ‘the cast are good’,” our head linguist said in a statement, or – as the police are insisting on calling it – suicide note.
“My back-and-forth discourse about religious symbolism in the comments sections of clips from The Sopranos has sharpened my wit to a fine point,” he told The Lampoon. “So it’s perfectly understandable that in real life I talk in a way that’s too articulate for some of my peers to understand.”
“It would be ridiculous to consider myself a critic,” he continued, while straightening his beret. “No, mine is the lot of a simple polemicist.”
Featured image: Adrian Scottow on Flickr